When I was a kid, I used
to play with my friends on the streets of my barrio in Puerto Rico.
Everything was so perfect. The green of the grass, the big trees and
the little park two blocks down the street. My childhood was perfect.
I was pretty much over-protected by my parents. All I knew as a kid
was two respect my parents and old people, my older
TV was opening new worlds and forms of nature for me. All the good cartons they used to show would make me spend more time on the sofa than on top of a tree. But, at the same time, it helped me and my friend to be more tight each day. Right after each episode of the Thundercats, or Transformers, Mazenger or Voltron, G.I. Joe or Silver Hawks, we would go out on the street to fight and flight and do all the great things that they ( by that time where like gods for us) would do on TV.
At some point I was into the Ninja stuff that I watched on TV and I would get my mom to buy me White Ninja pajamas, and go out to my friend to kick their asses. I really though that I could fight like them, climb walls like them, disappear in a big cloud of smoke like them, and be feared by the black ninjas.
To all these, I was not even
thinking of girls. I was having so much fun. Until one day, I felt
in love with a girl in school. I didn't know what to do or how to act
in front of her. I remembered seeing guys on TV kissing their girl-friend
so I thought that's what having a girl-friend was all about. It was
cool to imitate ninjas and other characters from TV. When I tried to
imitate the guys and the kissing, the girl told me "eeeuuuugh,
disgusting, what are you doing?" I understand that I was just
eight years old, but then I figured that she had no TV. That must have
being the reason for her surprising response to my attempt to kiss
her. Luckly, I was not allowed to watch any pornos. Who knows what
TV became a great influence
in my life. It basically set the standards of the way society and life
should be. Sometime it would should more fantasy than reality, but
all fantasies is based on the search for reality. My reality was based
on my limitations of imitating without getting hurt or hurt any body.
So I kept looking for a girl, like on TV to give me the kiss. I looked
but did not succeed. One day I was watching a movie, I believe it was
Top Gun. Oh, men! they where using their tongues to kiss. Something
new and interesting for my whole imitating urge. I wanted to "french
kiss". That was the topic for months. I remember I asked a friend
if they have done the tongue thing. I wanted to know why Tom
Other things kept adding to the list like for example: holding hands, hugging, blowing ears or even lick'em, touch here, grab there and on...
Today, I think about how
my behavior be with my girlfriend and how